May 2, 2013

White Dog was concerned that Quinn was heading for trouble this morning when, red eyed and dripping nose he struggled to awaken and stumble out for breakfast. He ate with gusto but it was obvious that seasonal allergies were hitting him hard.

All morning The White Dog Army made a point of checking on him as he slept in starts and jerks, then wandered in long circles. We all know the signs of an impending seizure and were sure that The Other White Dog was on the way to a crash.

At these times, YoYoMa "helps" best by intuitively keeping a greater than normal distance so Quinn does not feel threatened. Although a long time has passed since the early short-lived game of "top dog" when YoYoMa arrived and both boys have found peace in their interactions with each other, when TOWD is having an episode he becomes hyper-sensitive. To avoid his fear, Yo keeps a low profile.

Today was different. I sensed a new understanding from my usual goofy big boy as he slowly and submissively walked over several times to where Quinn rested and just gently sniffed his side. Then he moved away a couple of feet and laid down, watching but not in a direct confrontational way, more in concern. Quinn accepted this with caution and turned hi head away but did not panic.

They both fell asleep like this in the living room; Quinn quite soundly. White Dog rested in my chair when I went into the office to work.

I was terrified at the sudden sounds of Quinn's deep yowling and braying as I rushed out, expecting a fight on my hands...but I only heard Quinn. Coming into the room, YoYoMa rushed over from the corner where he had moved and I picked up the still manic Quinn. It was obvious that Yo was just as startled and terrified as I was and he tried to make sure I understood that he had done nothing to provoke this.

And he had not. Quinn awoke and found the living room virtually deserted (WD was not visible from the floor as she curls up deeply into the seat cushion). To my epi-boy it must have seemed that he was trapped alone with the sleeping YoYoMa (the "scary one" in his seizure state) and that we had all abandoned him.

"I am right here," I repeated over and over as he pressed himself into my embrace. "You are a good boy, YoYoMa," I reassured Yet Another White Dog who clung to my side needy and filled with apprehension, too.

Quinn just wanted to be near me, touching me and keeping me within his sight, so after a bit, we both went back to the office. YoYoMa was still at my heel needing to prove his good-boyness. With Yo at my left and Quinn at my right, I reached both hands down and stroked jangled boys while trying to read the computer screen.

Quinn got up to pace (I thought) but instead came around to Yo's side. YAWD was cornered between me, the desk, the wall and Quinn. He looked a little stricken as TOWD came paw-to-paw with him and then sank into a sleep position and closed his eyes.

YoYoMa sniffed, assessing this new situation and relaxed as I crooned to both what good boys they were to be so close and at peace. Quinn's paw actually covered Yo's tail, but he handled it with grace and looked at me for a solution, clearly choosing NOT to blast his way out of the trap or trampling Quinn.

I worked Yo's tail free and shifted the swivel of my chair so Yo could go under the desk and the out the other side. I handed him a piece of jerky in "thanks" and expected him to head toward freedom in another room. Instead, he accepted the treat and went behind me so that he could lie against Quinn's back leg.

Quinn shifted and moved closer. And there they rested, together, until Nuka came in and cuddled against Quinn's back.

This Thursday I am thankful that YoYoMa is smart and compassionate enough to ignore his ego and set aside the dynamics of who is "alpha."