TO BRING:
1. Lit Tiki Torch
2. Pleated Khakis
3. #MAGA Hat
4. White Polo Shirt
5. "Free Julian Assange" Banner
6. Roofies to Drug the Girls Who Friendzoned You
7. Contact Info for All Your 4Chan Peeps
8. Organic Whole Milk
9. Confederate Flag
10. Toothpaste?
TO DO:
1. Remind Mom to Lock Basement
2. Feed Snake & Gerbil
3. Log Out of World of Warcraft
4. Suspend all Sense of Irony and Credulity
5. Rub One Out to Anne Coulter's Face to Get it Out of Your System in Case You Run Into Her and Get Lucky
6. Come Up With Alibi for When You Get Outed to Your Boss at H&R Block
7. Double-Check Wanted Status with FBI
8. Resolve Outstanding Stalking Warrant
9. Pay Back Child Support
10. Forget #9
