Longtime readers of O.H.M. may recall the early 2015 saga of CDATPOS, or "Cute Dude at the Post Office Store," and the ensuing series of posts he spawned until he joined the national register of historic places in Juneau and promptly moved to Philadelphia.
Then back in May, a new CDATPOS, whom I immediately named CDATPOS 2.0, took over, and of course I posed to him ten burning questions. Just today--on his last day at Kindred Post a.k.a. the Post Office Store--CDATPOS 2.0 has FINALLY answered all of your/my burning questions!
Question 1: How do you plan on filling the adorable hipster sneakers of the original CDATPOS?
YIKES! I don't know if filling up those metaphorical shoes is even possible. There truly is no one like Conor [Editor's Note: Conor is the alias of the original CDATPOS]. Anyway, I actually prefer boots. They keep my feet warm, comfy, and safe while they stomp fascism.
Question 2: When you took this job, did you know about the long and handsome bearded shadow cast by your predecessor?
Of course. We're friends after all. CDATPOSes need to travel together in packs to ensure our survival and well-being.
Question 3: Do you even have any idea what I'm talking about right now, and if not, why not?
Oh, I learned about what you were talking about almost immediately. I was hit with half a dozen texts from people demanding that I answer you ASAP.
Question 4: Do you care, and if not, why not?
I mean, your followers have been waiting for this with bated breath for months now, right? :P
Question 5: Will you or will you not follow in the footsteps of your predecessor by cooking my family a delicious meal in your adorable hipster sneakers and emo music, which I will then live-blog for all the world to see?
That's a tall order for a guy that struggles with boiling water. Maybe for your family's sake, I'll pass.
Question 6: What new ink do you plan to get/new beard maintenance products will you endorse to commemorate this important milestone in your career?
For a while, I was considering getting "FUCK FASCISTS" on my ankle, to really make my super conservative mom really disappointed in me. For beard products, I've been using Cut and Caliber beard oil to keep my face smelling like a pine forest 24/7.
Question 7: Where do you stand on "cougars?"
I love them!
Question 8: Do you also wish to join Juneau's registry of historic places?
I think I'd add a little variety to the slew of places built by white colonizers. Sure!
Question 9: Are you prepared to assume the heavy mantle of CDATPOS 2.0?
I think I acquitted myself pretty well. I also really like the designation of 2.0. I feel like an upgrade. (Although there is no replacing Conor)
Question 10: Who is your #1 style inspiration (other than the original CDATPOS)?
I don't know if I have a #1. There's so many sharp dudes out there that inspire me. Maybe Michael Fassbender? He makes casual wear look gucci af.
BONUS QUESTION: Will you follow tradition and answer these burning questions, or will you be like POTUS and disregard well-established norms?
I couldn't live with being compared to our disgusting garbage fire of a president, so it was imperative for me to give you something here to keep my name clean. :)
Thanks for featuring me in your blog!
Editor’s note: I’ve added a picture of Pacho from Narcos because I’m watching it now and CDATPOS 2.0 is Pacho’s twin!!
Photo: Annie Bartholomew, KXLL radio, Juneau (courtesy CDATPOS 2.0’s Facebook page)