The White Dog Army split up to smother Steve (now on the couch) while the rest pressed against my legs and demanded to be petted. It was just the greeting I needed.
Then came the question. I knew they would ask. I had practiced different answers and different moods of response but when White Dog started by saying, "We know things were wildly successful but tell us every detail," I looked at her and tears welled up. Zsofia pushed her face against mine and I cried into her furs. The Army went silent.
"It wasn't," I told them. "everything went wrong. I should have listened to you all and just stayed home." The charity event on Paws To People's behalf, was in fact, a failure. Thankfully, we at least broke even...a far distance from the fund raising dollars that the organizer had promised. And it was money much needed to reach our goal for the year (which ends for us on June 30). We would not have another opportunity to replace this major event.
The White Dog Army and Steve gathered close and held me. "I feel like I just cannot get momentum going. I work so very hard and believe so much." I tried to pull myself back from those feelings but surrounded by my loved ones, I felt safe enough to melt down. "Not a single thing went in our favor."
"Except this," Steve said holding up a photo on his cell phone. "The booth looked great and Tony did a fantastic job on the Saloon Doggie Lounge for the Raffle. It got us lots of attention." It was creatively handmade from recycled materials and was donated with love by one of Steve's former students; we had lots of folks at the festival come up just to snap a photo. .
But even that was smudged by the day...the raffle earnings must now go to replace the pullup sign bent by the wind.