It's a nightmare before Christmas for Robert as he is summonsed to the prison to meet his namesake and love-rival. They can't punch each other's festive lights out, so Jonathan Harvey has them bitch at each other. Robert claims that he is not threatened by someone with "a designated bed-time", but Mr Just For Men seems a little rattled, even as he tells Rob that he has won because he's "out there" and Rob's "in here."
Tracy "Mardy Knickers" Barlow is still hoping for an "awesome" present, which she finds, not under the tree, but in Robert's coat pocket: a giant, sparkly engagement ring that didn't come out of a cracker. But with Robert telling her it's going to be a Christmas to remember, is he going to kick her to the kerb, or will he do what he promises Rob and make her Mrs Preston (again)? By the way, why does Tracy complain that she waited ages for a man and then two came along at once? She had Tony on her arm between Rob and Robert. More importantly, where is Big Jim? No room at the Big House for a Christmas cameo?
Meanwhile, Tyrone is still submerging his feelings about Hope's illness in the Lapland spectacular. All the residents are helping to decorate the street, including Sally, who sees "nothing wrong with a Snowball before midday" and Mary, who's excited about her two-course extravaganza "with optional pudding" with Brendan on 25th. Let's hope that she's not still talking about Brendan when she's telling an anecdote about using the wrong entrance at Christmas.
The snow machine's not working, the fuse in the lights have blown and, worst of all, Hope's not allowed out of hospital. But it's Hope by name, Hope by nature - as the trees finally light up, Fiz and Hope appear from a cab and the Brown-Dobbs family watch the stars come out, surrounded by friends and neighbours; it's a Christmas miracle.
David is still feeling aggrieved about Kylie's understandable anger about him walking out her and the kids, compounded by his taking Max to see Granny Marian. He doesn't understand why Kyles can't see the good in him when others can, but hardly helps his case when he says that there's "no excitement, passion or trust" between them. Let's hope that he's visited by three spirits (no, not Callum's ghost) overnight to help him change his ways.
Anna and Kevin flirt over mince pies whilst Tim and Craig have their work do in the cafe (without a stripper - is that really an office party thing? Not photocopying your nether regions and snogging someone unsuitable in the stationery cupboard?), before Tim has to go into town to do
The ghosts of Christmas past are brought up as Ken sorrowfully looks at Deirdre's photograph on this first Christmas without her, and the nouveau Connors decorate their tree with their mother's ornaments and drink a toast to her memory.
Have a Corrie Christmas, everyone!
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