It started to rain at about 6 AM, just in time for my morning walk with the dog. The dog can sense rain far off, so he was reluctant to go anywhere. So I leashed him up and walked out the gate and he immediately decided to pee before moving 6 feet. When he was done, he turned to walk back through the gate to go back inside. I , for my part was having none of it.
He was right however in his sense of what was to come. 2.5 inches of rain later found myself coming home from work to face the slow draining shower.
I set to work with plunger, plunging and plunging did not free the drain, it only succeeded in pulling up all manner of mottled and muddy semi solid material , which I described as soap scum when my wife came bounding in full of cheer after her 1.5 hour commute over flooded roads. Funny how that puts her in a mood. She saw my efforts and immediately did not like the looks of things. She said I am calling Rooter Master, no no I said, let me go downstairs and get the snakes. That is right snakes. I brought up 3 and set to work.
Why do I have three snakes, well it seems as thought I have been down this path before and seems as though I have always needed a better snake because I can not recall a single instance of ever having achieved success with a snake. Plungers yes, snakes no.
But I had already plunged myself into exhaustion, so it was time for the snake. I even enlisted my wife in the effort. Turn the crank as I try and jam the snake further into the drain. She continued with I am calling Rooter Master, no no I protested, just a little while more. What I won't do to save $150. Sloppy drain water was now splashing pretty freely and I was getting more than a little wet. Drain water has a pungency , no a smokey pungent aroma evocative of swamp and typhus. That smell is why the plumbers get paid the big bucks and I was starting to reek of it.
But on we went, all the while I am thinking this is the time where I WILL SNAKE THE DRAIN SUCCESSFULLY. About that time the snake curled into my shirt and with the turning crank it took up the material until the shirt was wrapped several turns about the snake. Squeezing me tightly into a position where it was hard to move or breath I knew the end was near. Upon realizing the absolutely ludicrous situation and after having spent an hour and a half on this war I said I thought you were going to call Rooter Master. At that we had a good laugh and I freed myself from the Anaconda so as to be able to fight another day.
She did call, they did come and within about 5 minutes the water drained down the drain. The stayed on for another 10 minutes for effect, or to take the sting out of MY paying for 5 minutes worth of work and they left. I imagine that they celebrate a 5 minute job with high fives and little dances, but they had the decency to not do it in my presence. He did however say, sometimes you just need the snake and drill combo, when I said I have never had success with snaking. His tip will probably cause me to visit the Tool Depot for snake number 4 complete with power .
After they left I was told that the phone had stopped working. Oh, boy the double whammy phone and plumbing, for I have had less success with the phone company repair line than I have ever had with the drain line. Verizon how can I infuriate you today will probably be my day today.
The dog chimed in, now you understand why I DON'T LIKE THE RAIN.