Random-Oji

I don't speak "emoji." The occasional  or seems like a good shortcut to self-expression, but I generally prefer real emotions to picto-graphical ones. Especially because there are a host of extremely random emojis that I can't imagine anyone ever actually using. I can only begin to guess what these mean and the context in which they are used:

: I squinted in vain for ten minutes trying to figure out what this was. It looks like a dick and balls dressed as a cactus for Halloween, but that can't be right, can it?

Apparently this is a dragon head. There must be some sci-fi nerd core peeps that punctuate all their texts and e-mails with  dragon heads.

: Not just a volcano, but a poster of a volcano. Maybe for texting suggested classroom decorations to your friend who teaches 8th grade earth science?

 For when you're meeting a friend for flan, but you're too lazy to type the word "flan."

 For when you accidentally step on your cat?

God, these really confuse me. It's your, Emoji keyboard. I'm just a  lookin' for a .