Reprogramming addictive thoughts...

The road to Sobersville is not easy - as GG brilliantly put it in a comment on my last post. It's not easy. I'm not going to gild the lily. Your body will pull you towards the booze and your brain will FREAK OUT and try every trick in the book to entice you to pick up again.

Thoughts like "I deserve it" or "I need it" or "everyone else drinks" or "it's a special occasion" or "I'm not going to have fun or relax without it" or my personal favorite the incredibly helpful "fuck it". That's just a general thought "fuck it I'm just going to drink".. it doesn't have any particular reason attached just a general "fuck it".

Those thoughts are not your friends.. they are not helpful or kind or wise.. they are the thoughts of your inner addict trying to get you to stay using the drug. So at first you have to be really really staunch about fighting them off. Talk about them out loud. Vocalise them to a friend or family member or just to yourself privately in the kitchen or while you are driving. Get them out.. separate them from you.. talk to them and tell them they're SHIT and have to go. Then work on replacing them with helpful kind thoughts.

Thoughts like "It's bollocks that I need it, I need it like a hole in the head" and "Lots of people get sober and happy and I can too" and "I'm going to be so happy tomorrow if I wake up with no hangover" and "I'm going to buy myself a fabulous new {insert object here} on Friday if I resist till then" and "I know that this will get easier and I will get to a place where I don't have this yearning" and "I only want the booze because I'm hungry/angry/lonely/tired/stressed what else can I do to deal with that."

Please add your own helpful kind thoughts below that you use to fight off cravings .. these are just some of mine. But the point is you need to identify that these desperate drinking thoughts are addictive thinking, you can start to turn them around and they will fade. That much is guaranteed!!!!!!

For me they used to come like a wave around 4.30pm but if I made it to 7.30pm ish I'd start to relax. Of course the house was always spotless by then because I'd be cleaning like a freak to keep myself distracted.

I've got in this lovely habit of having my slippers by the door and as soon as I get inside I pop them on - a relaxation trigger! Yes the onesie is getting quite a bit of use too (almost put it on at 4pm the other day, thank goodness I didn't because someone popped over unannounced! That never happens! Would have been very embarrassing if I'd been caught in full pink onesie glory).

I am really feeling the love. So many lovely people still reaching out and interacting on here and on Facebook. So many of us in the same boat. It's amazing, heartwarming, heartbreaking (at times), but strengthening and real. So very real. I keep saying it over and over but I'll say it again.. we need each other. That is all.

Love, Mrs D xxx