March 18, 2014

White Dog said, "If the Little Man could hop up onto my chair, I would let him eat his dinner up here. That might keep the white floofy vultures at bay!" She was reacting to my holding Oso in my arms and gently wiping his soft mash off of his face.

As most know, Oso is our slowest eater. He is of the old school of chewing each bite 199 times before swallowing. The rest of the WDA, except WD, are chowhounds and inhale their meals in forty seconds flat. In order to protect our deliberate one, we place him in the pantry area and barricade the door by turning a bench on its side. He eats alone in there on a small mat because the tile floor is slippery and his old legs lose traction. The others cluster on the other side of the bench looking over the top and try to mindmeld him into hurrying...or better yet, to giving up on his meal.

Bella, YoYoMa and Taiko will give up after a while or as a result of repeated threats from White Dog and settle down. Puff, however, is relentless.

My ancient old lady tries pushing the bench, climbing over it, nosing it aside. Tonight on Steve's late night of teaching Michael was in charge of feeding. Michael was quite proud of Puff tonight as she lay in front of the bench patiently waiting...or so it seemed.

But then he realized that our feisty little old lady had a corner of the mat between her paws and was slowly pulling it under the bench toward her. Of course Oso and his food bowl wobbled and slowly inched closer. When she realized Michael was on to her, she grabbed the mat in her teeth and gave a quick tug...and poor Oso went face first into his food.

My traumatized messy boy came to rest in my arms for calming and cleanup. His bowl was scooped up and put in the refrigerator, and Still Another White Dog headed out of the dog door totally unrepentant.

I am between a rock and a hard place...kind of proud of Puff's innovative plotting...yet upset that poor Oso only got to enjoy part of his dinner (he would not continue even with my attempting to hand feed him). These quandaries are exactly why I chose to avoid human motherhood.