I found this tonight and let me tell you, it made my night! I have been having trouble parenting my two three-year-olds the last few months. Really, since the baby was born, I've been struggling. They want so badly to be independent, and I feel like I've lost control. Parenting them was so much easier when they were little and my opinion was the only one that counted.
If you have children, particularly two-year-olds, I suggest you read this, and prepare yourself. It's gonna be one hell of a long road. Trust me. I'm on it.
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RANTS FROM MOMMYLAND:
Top Ten Reasons Why 3 is worse than 2
It seems to me that one of the most important things that no one told me about parenthood is that three is worse than two. Everyone is sort of prepared for the Terrible Two’s. Very few of us are ready for what happens next.
But this is the interwebs and I can't see you. So I'm going to tell you the truth. Three is a lot worse than two and here's why:
1. Three is two with intent.
2. The good news is, they can speak. Oh wait did I say good news? Guess who can parrot an overheard curse word perfectly? Except now they can do it understanding the importance of timing.
3. They’re mostly potty trained. Of course that also means that when they crap on the floor, it's even more disgusting and they’ve probably done it on purpose.
4. Their lungs are bigger. Therefore, the tantrums are louder – especially in public. They also are perfectly aware of what annoys and humiliates you. They know... Oh, they know.
5. Little girls get a wee bit emotional at three. Not a lot, just enough to turn your house into a damn telenovela.
6. Little boys act as if destruction and mayhem is their job. More than their job - their duty.
7. All of a sudden – they get picky, picky, picky. After eating macaroni and cheese every other day their whole life, get ready to hear: "Momma. I not gonna eat dese noodles. Dey haf cheese all over dem and dat's GROSS."
8. They're independent and doing more things for themselves, which means that doing anything now takes approximately forever.
9. They're smart. So you can no longer trick them into eating healthy things or playing quietly while you try to gather your shattered nerves. Also, they’re self-aware enough to weigh the consequences and take what’s coming to them. Flooding the bathroom floor is totally worth ten minutes in time out.
10. Are you ready to leave your house? Well, your toddler isn't. Are you ready to walk down the street? Your toddler isn't. Is it time for you to leave the playground? Well, your toddler really, really isn't. And that's why we call it turtle herding.
I speak the truth, hookers. I'm really sorry. And you're welcome.
But at least now you're prepared. Maybe.
-Julianna W. Miner
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My favorites are 1, 8 & 9:
Number one because it's just plain true. The same things the boys got into trouble doing as two-year-olds, are way more infuriating now that they're three because I know they know better!
Number eight because everything truly does take forever. And God forbid I try to help to speed things along. Logan has been known to undress himself after I've dressed him just so he can "do it himself." So help me.
And finally number nine because I have seen Jack, in all his wisdom, weighing the consequence I have threatened with whatever behavior he wants to engage in. And there are times when he finds it to be worth it. Like the other day when he jumped on his bed and I told him if he did it again he'd have to sleep on the floor and he replied, "I want to sleep on the floor." And he climbed out of bed and laid on the hard wood. I.WAS.FURIOUS.
Anyway, I am counting down the days until they turn four (roughly 121 days, 16 hours & 3 minutes) and praying that their behavior will improve. (Even though I'm pretty sure it won't.)