Mother in Law

I just never had any issue to speak of with my mother in law. I know that there are countless mother in law jokes and snidism. I never got it. Was I lucky or tolerant, I really don't know. My In Laws were great people, my father in law died when he was 71, of colon cancer--the same cancer that took my brother and my best friend. All within the space of a year. Lets resolve to have a colonoscopy this year.

But back to the In Laws, my Father in Law was a genuinely nice man. He liked people, liked working , he never did retire, he loved his house, his yard and cooking and he would do the cleaning when my mother in law was at work. He did not hunt, fish, play cards, run around. He would read, work in the yard, listen to music. He was a nice guy.

My mother in law was a bright, engaging , somewhat distrustful person, but we always got along and she was a great grandmother to my children. After her husband passed, they spent several summers with her at her lake, swimming, doing crafts, playing with other kids , catching fireflies and fish. That she loved my children so greatly allowed me to love her greatly.

She is ill now, and she has been for a year. Congestive Heart Failure--which is brought about by her diabetes and her age. It is the heart failure that kills more people than cancer and it is something I never really saw in action before. It is not an easy illness to deal with. It has left her sapped of vitality and strength and will probably cause her death.

I went over to her house, she stubbornly refuses to leave, and stubbornly refuses to allow anyone to come in and take care of her, to pick her up for New Years Day Dinner, she came, but my feeling was that she was only coming because she knew this would be the last New Years Day she would spend with her family. I had that feeling and I was nearly brought to tears by the thought of it. I share the pain my wife feels and my brother in laws feel at her condition.

So on Saturday and Sunday, when my wife and I go over to clean her house and do her laundry and vaccuum and grocery shop, I will go with an idea in my mind that this might be the last time I can do something for her and I hope in that she will know that her son in law loved her greatly.

And forgive me if I don't laugh at someone's mother in law joke--see I just never got them.