Coronation Street weekly awards, July 19 - 23

Boy who cried Wolf award: John Stape of course. And Fiz is right. I don't think he *does* know the difference any more. Utimatum issued. Promise made. Your lips say yes but your eyes say: "Will I 'eck as like." He tore up the resignation letter he promised to send.

Looking a jail cell in the face award: Ironic star: Stape says: "I've been in prison. I don't want to go back." Um.....

Cat's out of the bag award: Gold Star: Gail found out Lewis was an escort, or, "prostitute" as Claudia put it.
Silver star: Ryan found out about Sophie and Sian.

My Hero award: Gold Star: Owen got Sian to hospital in double time!
Silver Star: Chesney for being constantly sarcastic and nasty to Stape. And I love it!


Take me to bed or lose me forever award: Gold Star: Charlotte for winding up John and blackmailing him into bed, or trying to. "I'll even call you Colin if you like!" (Bwahahahaha!)

Blast from the past award: Musty star: Why on earth would Audrey still have Reg Holdsworth in her address book? Why would she have it at all? And Sergei the Russian sailor that only wanted her to marry him for a residency? Why would he have been in there? Stupid writing.

He's not that into you, Mark II and III: II: Audrey wants Lewis to move in. He's hedging his committments. He might end up in the doghouse out back with Nick. III: Charlotte is turned on by John's schemes. You know you want it. I don't, he says. Of course not. She's far too old for his tastes.

Cranky Soup award: Gold Star: Who peed in Eileen's cornflakes award? She's been out of sorts and touchy for weeks. Steve and Lloyd's attitude didn't help.


Lines of the Week:
Eileen: "You can stick that and your switchboard and your scuzzy flamin' chair right up your airport tunnel!"
Colin: "John, Mate, how are you? They've not locked you up yet!?" (no, not *yet*)
John about Charlotte: "She's the last person that would cause us trouble." (wanna bet????)
Michelle teaching her son: "You have to learn to pretend if you want to get anywhere with women." (and that, my dear, is why you keep hooking up with losers)
Ciaran to Ryan about the music: "Do you not have a decent boyband?" (like oh... Boyzone?)
Rita: "There's a little bald headed newsagent who is sticking pins in a model of a flame haired temptress at this very minute... cause I'm late back from lunch!" (She's still got it and all!)
David to Natasha: "Makes you wonder... who *your* successor will be!" (HA! Good one, David!)