Google Your Little Heart Out

It's time for another in-depth analysis of which scintillating search terms brought hapless new readers to the high-brow, sophisticated entertainment that is this blog.

1. U tube sharks eyeballs: While I don't recall posting anything about shark eyeballs, I have hosted several riveting discussions on the optometric (Look! A new word!)short-comings of goats. Perhaps those were helpful? No? Well, then next time you do a search, try actually typing out the entire word "you." Most websites don't use text-speak when crafting a domain name.

2. Milk pills: Oh, seriously. Again? This means there is more than one person out there actively trying to avoid drinking milk in its liquid form. Unless you're an astronaut or a believer that you must live in a bunker, without refrigeration, to avoid the impending Zombie Goat crisis, milk pills do not need to take up space in your pantry.

3. Hershey selling reasons: My friend, *speaks gently* Hershey doesn't need to sell reasons. For 99% of the population, chocolate is reason enough.

4. Zombie Goats: You, dear Googler, display the kind of mental acumen and common sense that is most welcome on this blog. Welcome home.

5. Oh, no she didn't!: Oh, yes, I did. Twice.